Monday, December 31, 2007

See You Next Year!

I hope 2007 was a great year for all of you. And if it wasn't, may the coming year be full of wonderful surprises and blessings and all of that good stuff!

I wish you all the best, friends! I hope you guys have a blast tonight (figure of speech, y'all - don't take it literally)! Don't do anything too wild!

In the meantime, I will be celebrating the New Year with my parents, in the living room, sitting on the couch, watching TV, and probably dozing off before the New Year clocks in.

Wohoooooooooooooow!

This lady wishes you all a very exciting, surprising, wonderfully bloggy,

Happy New Year!

2008, here we come!

Sunday, December 30, 2007

All I Wanted For Christmas Was..

Why me, Santa? Why??


PORN?!?!

Hahahahaha.. Waaaaaahahahaha.. I can't stop laughing! Check this out:

A young girl from Tennessee opened her Christmas present from Santa, only to find that he brought her an mp3 video player.... full of PORN! The girl cried and said "Why would Santa do this to me?"

Unbeknownst to the girl, her parents bought it from a Walmart in Sparta, Tennessee, assuming of course that it was brand new. But in actual fact, it was a returned mp3 player that the previous owner had filled with very graphic porn.

Walmart said that their returns policy requires electronic items to be sent back to the manufacturer, and not to be put back on sale again.

Poor girl, to have her innocence "stolen like that", said her dad. I can only imagine her horror!

Walmart and their stupid return policy ruined Christmas! *sob*

Source: msn.com Pic: jupiterimages.com

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Keira Knightley


This girl annoys me. Seriously, I can't stand her in movies. It's bad enough that she has to pout her way through hours of precious movie-time, but now I have to see her pout on the covers of my favorite magazines.

I have a problem with pouting (this topic alone deserves a whole new post). I shall only say this for now - I HATE IT. It's fake and it's noticeable! Don't think I can't tell! Because I can!

So anyway, back to Keira. I don't like it when she smiles (or laughs). She scrunches her nose in this weird way. And her teeth and mouth look very strange.

Another problem I have with Keira, is that the girl loves to flaunt her nakedness! This is just annoying. What’s there to flaunt? Girlfriend, you are skinnylicious. No curves, no nothing!

She says, “People ask me to pose naked and I just say yes. I find it vaguely liberating. I hope I don’t become a nudist, but I’m definitely on my way.”

Check out some of her shots.

This lady is not impressed.


The face of Coco Mademoiselle (Chanel) perfume - 2007.

With Tom Ford and Scarlett Johannson, Vanity Fair Feb 2006 cover.


Cover of Interview magazine - December 07/January 08 issue

Sources: madmoizelle.com, dailymail.co.uk, imnotobsessed.com

Friday, December 28, 2007

R.I.P - Benazir Bhutto

Benazir Bhutto
1953-2007


Former Prime Minister of Pakistan. First woman to be elected as a head of a Muslim state.


Its a sad day for democracy. It really is. It's a shame people have to resort to killing off opponents because they can't handle outcomes other than what they want.

Democracy accounts for the majority's vote. Even if we don't get what we like, we have to accept it. That's democracy.

Unfortunately, in most Muslim states, they just can't accept this fact.

Its a shame really. Such a shame.


Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Bad Monkey!

Whaaat?? What'd I do??

Did anyone hear about this??

And I quote:

" ‘Indecent’ monkey confiscated: The Ministry of Commerce shut down a shop in Mubarakiya for putting a monkey on display, reports Al-Watan daily. The monkey allegedly caused inconvenience to passersby and was known to be doing indecent acts. The monkey was handed over to the zoo. "

Wahahahahaha! This is the funniest peice of news ever!

What do you think he (I'm assuming its a he, of course!) was doing?

Hahaha.. This lady wants to buy him!

He would give Mommy a heart attack!



Decisions Decisions!

As you may have established by now, this lady is unemployed. And she needs a job. Like now! But I'm a tad too lazy to work.

All my friends have regular stable jobs, so there's no point in staying at home in the mornings, because there's no one to go out with. Except for my mom, but that's another story.

So anyway, I submitted my resume to a company without any optimism on my part. I always thought that you had to almost beg for the job, by calling the company, showing extra interest, and perking up your resume. Well, I didn't do that. I submitted a toned-down one-page C.V. I gave them my number (even though it was on the C.V) and left. And guess what?

They called! I got a call the next day, asking me for a quick random interview. I went, chatted with them and left feeling ok. I was surprisingly relaxed. I guess that when you don't have high expectations, you don't put pressure on yourself.

Anyway, I got a call a couple of days ago from someone in the company saying they were really impressed (who? me??), and that there are 3 departments who want to have me! *Blink, Blink*

So here's where the pressure kicks in. I have to choose between the 3! I asked around, and here's a simple breakdown.

Dept 1: Strict boss (i.e no slacking), interesting work, good team.
Dept 2: Friendly boss, kinda ok work, non-existent team (i.e need staff now!).
Dept 3: Ok/Nice boss, kinda ok work, fun team (i.e lots of fun colleagues).

What to do? What to doooooo??

This lady needs the $$$. But can't make a decision..

P.S Did I mention they want a decision by the end of this week? Like, tomorrow!?!
P.S.S Does being a Libra (think: scale) have anything to do with this?

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

We Wish You A Merry Christmas!


December 23, 2007

An American woman has stabbed her husband with a kitchen knife in an argument that started when she accused him of opening a Christmas present early.

Misty Johnson, a 34 year old American woman from Wyoming was arrested and charged with aggravated assault and battery, a felony, and misdemeanor domestic battery after she stabbed her husband in the chest with a kitchen knife.

The reason? An argument that started with him opening a Christmas present early!

I don’t know if I should laugh or cry about this! (I’m laughing by the way)

Her husband, Shawn Fay Johnson, aged 34, called the police to report the incident, saying that his wife had stabbed him. He was treated at a hospital for from the chest wound. He told the authorities that his wife started arguing with him after he opened a Christmas present.

The argument heated up and led to other topics, because Misty soon accused her husband of having an affair and then decided to stab him.

Police Detective David Thompson did not know what the present was, or if it was intended for the husband (Shawn).

Misty and Shawn were married in September.

LOL! Where’s your ‘Christmas Spirit’ Misty??


Source: smh.com.au

Monster-In-Law

Hahahaha this is sooo funny!! I hope my future mother in law doesn't turn out like this!


This lady received this in an email forward. So I hope nobody gets all copyright on her.

Btw, does anyone remember a movie from the 90's called 'Monster In Law'? It was creepy!

Correction: The movie I meant was Serial Mom (1994), whereas Monster-In-Law was released in 2005.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

I LOVE THE WEATHER!!



I LOVE THIS WEATHER!

IT MAKES ME WANNA SING!

I LOVE THIS WEATHER!

IT'S TIME FOR A FLING!



How do you like my poetry? Lovely isn't it? I wanted something that rhymes with sing and couldn't remember anything except fling.

Anyhooo.. Isn't the weather amazing??? For those of you who aren't lucky enough to be in Kuwait at the moment, the temperature is approximately 13 degrees Celcius during the day, and 4 degrees Celcius at night.

The sky is the loveliest blue, and the weather is crisp and cool. The sun is shining. I can't see a single cloud in the sky. It makes me want to stay out in the garden, drink some tea, play with the dogs and watch the cars go by..

This lady is in serenity..

El7imdillah ya rab 3ala hal ni3ma.. Allahuma zeed oo barik.. Ameen..
(Thank You God for all of your blessings.. God grant us more of Your blessings. Amen.)

Eediyahs..

I don’t want to give out 3eediyas!

For all my international readers (they’re probably only 3 anyway), a 3eediya – pronounced eediyah – is money given to children during the Islamic Eid celebrations. It is a Kuwaiti tradition (I don’t know if its done anywhere else) where adults give out money to children, teenagers, and sometimes 20-somethings like me.

It can differ from household to household. For example, in my family, my mother, aunts and older cousins, all have kids, but they still receive eediyahs from their parents. Other families give money to children and teenagers only. Usually, when a person becomes employed (and over 23 mostly), they stop receiving eediyahs and instead start giving out eediyahs to the kids, like nieces and nephews, or young cousins.

The amount of money given also differs from person to person, mostly depending on your income, and your generosity. From what I’ve seen, the average given to children is KD10 (approx USD 30) and to teenagers KD20, and closer relatives usually give more, while non-relatives may give less. Some rich cheapskates give less too. Grandparents and parents usually give MORE!!

Efff… I swerved way off-topic. But you deserve it, international readers! All 3 of you!!

So anyway, I don’t want to give out eediyahs. I’m still young, fabulous, and broke. I need someone to give MEEEE eediyahs. Not me give THEM!! I need the money, I’m too old to ask my parents all the time (although age never stops me hehehe).

Before you get the wrong idea, I’m not a cheapo. I’m really generous. No really I AM!! I swear! It’s just that giving out eediyahs makes me feel old. And I don’t need that kind of drama right now. I noticed that many adults stopped giving me some $$$ because I’m too old for it I guess. Although I believe there is no such thing as being too old for money!! I also noticed that many kid relatives started congratulating me on Eid, whereas they used to ignore me before. I think it’s because they noticed I’m an adult now and they think I’m going to give them money. Hah! Fat chance.

This lady is beginning to dread Eid. It’s so awkward for her now!

Friday, December 21, 2007

My Eid

Our Eid Traditions

Once upon a time, we (the family) decided to make it an Eid tradition to have a breakfast feast early morning of the first day of Eid. This tradition lasted only once and failed to be repeated. So breakfast now constitutes of fitting mouthfuls of food and drink into our mouths in the midst of all the screaming, make-up, dressing and more.

One of the reasons we stopped our “tradition” is because we wake up late. Every year, my sisters and I threaten each other that we won’t help each other with make-up, dressing, hair, etc, etc unless supposed “late sleepers” wakes up early. Of course, threatening doesn’t work, and we all rush through things every time. We still follow the same tradition of wearing a brand new never-worn outfit for the first day of Eid.

Typical First Day of Eid

We’re supposed to wake up at 8, be done at 9, and start our rounds by 9:30. We’re forced to visit gazillion family members because many of them we see only twice a year. However, half of us wake up at 10, fight, argue, get dressed, discover that our outfits/hair/accessories do not look like what we intended them to be. Change hairdo, lessen makeup, and then give up trying.

If you think the girls in our family are psycho, you should see the guys! My brothers wake up later than we girls do, then fight over who gets to shave first, and who is hogging the bathroom longer (For some reason, before they built our house, my parents thought that two boys sharing a bathroom is much less drama than two girls sharing a bathroom. They were wrong.) After that, they complain that their dishdashas aren’t ready yet, or their qitra’s are not ironed to perfection, and start shouting at us girls that we’re making them late. Another tradition we managed to keep is that we visit our relatives altogether. My dad goes out on his own time, and my mom leaves at 8:00 am to prepare things at my grandma’s house because it’s an open house and she receives visitors until nighttime.

After going to all our relatives, congratulating them, making awkward conversation, being forced to eat different sweets and drink tea or coffee, our stomachs are bloated but grumbling for some real food. By that time its 2:00 pm, where have our lunch (or some may call a feast!) at my grandparent’s house. After lunch, we kick off our heels, and just lay down on the sofas breathing out a looooooooong sigh of relief.

The worst part of the day is over, and now we have the rest of the day to ourselves. We continue our day staying with our grandma and continuing to receive visitors. But at least by this time, we’re relaxed and staying in one place, not running around like headless chickens!

By nighttime, exhaustion kicks in, and I just flop down on the bed with a big smile on my face. Aaaaah my lovely bed!

So that’s it. That’s our Eid. That’s why I’m not fond of it.

Come to think of it. That’s what I love about Eid after all!
All the craziness is just part of our unique and dysfunctional family celebration! I can’t wait when we all get married and have kids and include them into this lovely, yet wild, tradition!

Note: I do realize that I didn’t write anything about eediyahs! This post is too long anyway. I’ll save it for another one.

Heaven and My Little Cousin

The cutest conversation between me and my 4 year old cousin.

Cousin: Do you love God?

Me: Of course I do! Do you?

Cousin: Yes! Because He gives me eeeeeeeeeverything! He gave me my eyes, my nose, my ears, my mouth, my chocolates, my toys. Eeeeeeeeverything!

Me: Yes He did. He gave me everything too.

Cousin: Why does God live in Heaven?

Me: Because Heaven is very nice! It's so beautiful and big. And its up in the sky!

Cousin: Can we visit Heaven for the vacation? (He's on his Winter Break now)

Me: No. We can only go there when we die.

Cousin: Like our grandfather?

Me: Yes, like him.

Cousin: Is there a big slide in Heaven? Can I go on it?

Me: Yes you can, because in Heaven you can't fall and get hurt.

Cousin: YES!! And can I eat AAAAAAAAALLL the chocolate in the world?

Me: Yes because you can't get a tummy ache.

Cousin: But what if I want to throw up?

Me: You can't. Because in Heaven you don't throw up.

Cousin: But what if I do?? Will God bring me a bin to throw up in?

I couldn't help laughing!! Kids can be so innocent!!

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Safat.kuwaitblogs.com


I don't get it. I really don't. I don't understand what it should take for me to be on the list at the Kuwait Blogs website (see title)!

When I first joined the blogosphere, I wrote what I wanted and then waited.. hmmm ok now when do the comments start pouring in?

My friend (who first taught me how to blog) said "You need to comment on other people's blogs, so they can visit yours. And apply your blog to the Kuwait Blogs site." So I did that. The site's 2 requirements were: 1. "Must be from or about Kuwait" (I'm assuming this is the blog or the writer) and 2. "Must have at least 3 posts spanning the current month". I waited for about a month.. nothing. I think that during that month, my posts were not related to Kuwait, but I definitely was a Kuwaiti, so since I posted more since then, I decided to send another request. Both times I received an email notification that they received my request, but the second time, they said (and I quote) "Also please do not send multiple requests to add your blog. We received it the first time and will process it in due time. Sending multiple requests will delay your process."

So I waited.. and waited.. and waaaited.. nothing! That was in August, this is December! I've long stopped checking the Blog Aggregate site to see if I'm in or not. But today, I was reminded after I read Shosho's post (http://shayouma.com/2007/12/19/thank-you-nibaq/). My hyperlink thingy is not working so I have to paste links the old way.

I don't really mind that I haven't been listed. Because since then, I've visited countless blogs, both Kuwaiti and International, and gathered a collection of favorites. I've also managed to secure quite a handful of frequent readers! Yaaay! Good job right? It's just that curiosity is a nagging mother blogger! I simply want to know whyyyyy?? There isn't even a comments or contact us thingy!

And also, I've seen and checked most of the listed blogs there, and many of them have been dormant for months and some for over a year! Why are they still there? I don't know what sort of organizational system they have going on over there but anyway..

Just wanted to vent. Had a fun Eid!

This lady wishes you all a good night :)

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

...The Results Are In!


"They Loooooooooooooove Meeee!!"

Ok, maybe not all of them.. Grrr..

Even though I think blog rating is wrong and meaningless, curiosity got the best of me (as well as my Copycat Syndrome - when I copied Grey's idea of a blog-rating poll).

Since I'm a relatively new blogger, I wanted to see what people thought about this blog. I allowed people to rate me from 1-5 stars. Zero is out of the question.

The poll closed yesterday, and I put the results into a chart (see above).

46 % of my readers think very highly of me. As do I, my dears, as do I :)
27 % of my readers think I'm cool. You just had to put 4 stars right? Too cheap to add another one?
15 % of my readers (or not?) think I'm ok. No comment here.
12% of worthless visitors decided I'm not worth it. Beware my wrath, you goodfornothings. Don't let me catch you over here.

The moral of this post is that rating is over-rated. After all, isn't the purpose of blogs to say whatever you want without having people judge you? It doesn't matter what others think, it only matters what YOU think of yourself!

And this lady thinks she rocks!

Monday, December 17, 2007

Where For Art Thou??



I read a lot of blogs. Too many, actually.

I have a list of favorite blogs that I try to check on a daily basis. I look forward to reading what these people (who have become like part of my family) write and what they've done, and so on.. It really makes my day! Many times, I'd rather stay at home and blog about (reading and blogging) than go out.

So anyway, it really angers me and saddens me when I click on one of these links only to find out that this person's "blog/page has been deleted".

At first I get shocked, then there's disbelief *Click. Click. Click*, then there's sadness. "Where are you, blogger???? Where did you goo?? Don't leave meee!! I need you!!!!"

And finally comes anger. "Grrrrrrr.. I don't need you, idiots. You can remove your blogs all you want. I have lots more to entertain me. You can go to hell for all I care"

But actually I do care! I'm so attached to these people that it breaks my heart when they leave without so much as a goodbye! *sniff*

One of the latest bloggers to go MIA, only to reappear privately, was Shoosha. I was stricken when she left! I loved that little minx! But thank God she returned. Pheeew! Saved me from some drama.

Other bloggers who pulled the plug on their blogs are Cixousian Panic. Anybody know where she went? Chronicles of Random's blog is still there, but she hasn't written for one month and 2 days. Yes, I count. And many more that I can't remember. Why do bloggers dissapear all of a sudden. Why??

So anyway, just a word of advice, Don't you dare do that to me, bloggers! Don't even think about it!

But if you do, save this little lady some tears, and give her some prior notice ok?

Sunday, December 16, 2007

Ho Ho Ho?


Naughty Santa from www.istockphoto.com



My friend is on vacation in Europe. Grrr.. Lucky *Beep* (Don't be mad, baby, I still love you)

Anyway, so we all know that Christmas is approaching, and Europe is full of gorgeous festivities at this time. And in the spirit of things, H, my friend, decided she wanted to see Santa Claus, since she hasn't seen him for so long..

Well, the bimbo sent me a text saying, "Hey! I just took a picture with Santa and I sat on his lap! It was so much fun!" She said it so innocently I just couldn't help laughing!

Umm.. a 23 year old girl sitting on Santa's lap.

Are you thinking what this lady is thinking?

Me thinks Santa got what he wanted!

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Bottomless Pit!

Skinny version of me courtesy of www.fotosearch.com/comp/unn/unn347/woman-in-h



I feel like a bottomless pit. I've gotten so fat I can't even remember what I looked like 1 year ago!

I may not be considered "fat" in the real sense of the word (but definitely in Hollywood), but I'm getting close. I've let myself eat too freely during the past months (which to my horror added up to a whole year!!), that now I'm so afraid to weigh myself. My scale is missing - or maybe it just ran away out of fear of being squashed.

All in all, last time I checked, I've gained approximately 8 kilos *sobbing*, and I'm sure I've added more but since my scale is MIA, I'll have to guess. My jeans and pants don't fit anymore. They don't pass my enormous thighs. I've grown a butt that I didn't know I could have. My tummy sticks out so proudly like a kangaroo pouch. My face became rounder and more cheek-y. Even my rings don't fit on my fingers now!

The only positives are that my arms are not fatter, and my face looks younger and more plump. Also, my *ahem* boobs grew a size, but look nicer than they did before.

These days I'm surviving on wearing track suits and/or dresses. Tracksuits are easy to wear, and dresses hide all the atrocities. So I'm on a diet now. Atkins to be precise. I like it and it likes me. So far, so good. I like protein and my body needs it because I'm pretty sure I overdosed on carbs. I don't eat junk food, but I eat everything else. The past few months witnessed an overeating pig that gorged on sugars, carbs and lots and loooots of chocolate!!

Since it's my fault that I became a bottomless pit, I have to endure the severe withdrawal symptoms of not having my daily breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks of chocolate, chocolate and cake. Is there a Gluttons Anonymous - as in Alcoholics Anonymous? I might have to start it.

This lady has to fit into a new dress by Wednesday (for Eid). Pray for me, will you?

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Girl on Girl Action?

This question is for all my guy readers out there. Or anyone else who stumbled here either by sheer luck or by mistake. Lesbians please refrain from commenting because this question is addressed to straight men only and will answer one of the most important questions that has been nagging me forever.

Why do men like girl on girl action??
Do all men feel that way??
Why is it that this is such a recent development in sexual fantasies? I never heard about this 6 or 7 years ago.
Doesn't it make you feel sick? I mean, I know that most girls (if not all) are not attracted to man on man action!! Eeew! Its like watching gay porn. Turn off for straight people, I'm sure.

Do this lady a favor and answer pleeease ;)

Sunday, December 9, 2007

Shake it Off..


I was just watching our dogs take a "shower" in the garden. Soaked in water, they looked so funny, wet and skinny, compared to the huge fluffy things things that they are.

I was laughing and watching them from a few metres away because I didn't want to get soaked. All of a sudden, one of the pair decided to involve me in the action, running up to me, and trying to jump on me, while also rubbing his fur on my legs.

Then he moved back a metre, and started shaking all the water off! ON ME!! I was screaming and laughing at the same time because the little genius knew I didn't want any water on me, but it was just his way of having some mischevious fun! Then he simply left and continued his bath.

Wouldn't it be fun if we could just shake things off?

Not just the water after a shower.

But everything else.

This lady would love to just shake it off.

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Elizabeth

picture courtesy of viewlondon.co.uk


Spanish Ambassador:

"There is a wind coming that will sweep away your pride."

Queen Elizabeth I:

"I too can command the wind, sir! I have a hurricane in me that will strip Spain bare if you dare to try me!"


My favorite two quotes from the movie Elizabeth: the Golden Age. This movie is full of brilliant ones, even though the film itself was a tad dissapointing.

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Transparent Bra Straps!

Pic courtesy of Nordstrom.com

This post is dedicated to all the girls who wear this, all the guys who have girls that wear this, and all the people who have to suffer from watching this.

It’s when girls wear those transparent bra straps and clasps, thinking that they won't show when in actual fact; they're as obvious as the sun!

Honey, it’s transparent NOT INVISIBLE!!

Some of them may be called invisible, but trust me they're not. If I can see them (I have poor eyesight) then everyone else can. I'm assuming you're wearing them because you're against "obvious" bra straps showing. Well, hate to break it to you, but they still show.

When you wear them with strapless dresses or tube tops, THEY SHOW.
When you wear them with one-shoulder dresses/tops, THEY SHOW.
When you wear them with backless dresses/tops, THEY SHOW.
When you wear them with wide neck tops, THEY ALSO SHOW.

THEY SHOW THEY SHOW THEY SHOW!!!

For goodness sakes, ladies, take a look in the mirror!! See what I mean?

Buy yourselves a good solid strapless bra and skip the invisible-ness.

This lady is saying this for your own good, darlings!! I might even throw in a voucher or two.

Sunday, December 2, 2007

Dilemma

I'm stuck in a rut, I must say. I have to make a decision. Like, now!

Okay maybe not now, but soon. Maybe you guys can help me out. Maybe I should start a new poll.

Anyway, here it is. I want to continue my studies and do my masters degree. Only thing is, I want to do it abroad. My parents are okay with it, always have been (about studying abroad). But my friends are discouraging me, and with good reason too.

I'm not too worried about my future "marriage life" because I beleive in fate, and if it happens, then it'll happen. If it won't, then it won't. But they all tell me that if I do, then I'll ruin all my chances because by the time I get back, I'll be a) older, and b) people will forget about me! What the hell?? I don't care if they forget about me! As long as I do what I wanna do right?

But somewhere, deep down, it kind of got to me. What if I do ruin my chances? I mean, even though my parents are open-minded, they still won't let me marry anyone except a Kuwaiti. But the more important issue is that, I've lived abroad before, and I know its really hard to adapt to life in Kuwait after life outside. So I'm worried that if I do it, it'll be really hard for me to come back, especially since I'm older and more mature and more aware and appreciative of life in foreign countries. I might decide to stay there! And I know that would be hard for my family to accept.

On the other hand, if anybody knows of some available bachelors working abroad... *hint hint* Can we say, hook me up??

This lady doesn't know what to dooooooo!!

Saturday, December 1, 2007

Acne


Picture: library.thinkquest.org/11960/media/acne.gif


Comedian on David Letterman:


"My wife uses birth control that also clears acne. Coincidentally, when I was a teenager, acne was my form of birth control."


LOOOL that cracked me up!

Hahahaha..

Acne.

This lady thanks God she never had (or has) it. *touches wood*